Praying With Your Spouse

I'm sure you've heard before that married couples who pray together on a consistent basis have a divorce rate of less than 1%.  However, according to Focus on the Family, 95% of pastors do not pray with their spouse on a regular basis - and while I'm not sure what the percentage is for Christian couples in general, it's probably a safe bet that about the same percentage of married couples lacking consistent prayer in their relationships too.  

Of course we don't need statistics to tell us that building a foundation of prayer within our marriages strengthens it.  The Bible tells us  that "A cord of three is not easily broken" (Ecc. 4:12); prayer strengthens our marriage and protects it. 

In fact there are several benefits to be gained from praying together: 

• We can pray together about issues that we face, bringing them together to God rather than trying to solve them on our own.
  
• We build trust with our spouse as we pray, allowing issues and joy to be shared openly.
• Through prayer we put Christ at the center of our marriages, allowing his protection, healing, and forgiveness to work where necessary.
  

For these and many other reasons, prayer is an essential aspect of a healthy marriage.  Here are some suggestions to help you establish a regular prayer routine with your spouse: 

Be intentional about finding the right time and place to pray together.  For some, that may be last thing at night, but if you have different sleep patterns, you may need to find a different time. Once you've found the best time, then add to your schedules and encourage each other to follow through.   

Be sure to talk about your prayer needs together. You may want to pray about issues affecting one of you, about issues facing your children or other loved ones, future direction etc. However, don't go for an in depth discussion, since the prayer time can quickly become overtaken. 

You will need to become comfortable with one another's differing prayer styles.  Remember, no one style is "better" than another. Also practice listening prayer, being comfortable with silences during your prayer time will enable you to listen to what God may want to say to you. 

Allow yourselves the flexibility to pray openly and freely about the issues of the day. 

Stick with it.  This may be an aspect of marriage that will take a while for you to feel comfortable. But as you persevere, you are strengthened and blessed by the God who brought you together and who cares for you.